Chapter 19: Alone

Miko:

The waves crashed against my legs as I violently coughed up seawater. My fingers dug into the pale sand as I fought to catch my breath. Warm rays of the sun beat against my back as the last spurts of salty spit burnt against my lips. A breeze carried through my wet hair, though my bangs barely moved due to being soaked from the swim. If you could call it a swim, Maleki did most of the work. Where was Maleki, or Nomen, for that matter? I don’t remember how I got here, just that we were swimming that last trek, and then I woke up on the sand in a coughing fit. We got separated, so the best idea is to wait here, and Maleki will come to find me. All he has to do is travel the beach’s rim, and he will find me eventually. Yes, that’s the best idea, one he likely would have arrived at before I had since he always gets to be the more reasonable older brother who always has a plan. “Stay here.” I imagined him saying bluntly. “If we get split up, I will find you, but if you go off on your own, it just makes it harder.” The shape of a theoretical Maleki getting onto me for being too hasty formed in my mind. This massive island was big, but circling the beach wouldn’t be too difficult, and they couldn’t be too far, so a day of walking at best. If they don’t show up tomorrow, I will just set up a little totem of sticks to show I was here and which direction I headed so that we don’t run around in circles.

Now, the next thing I need to do is identify my surroundings, assess what I have on me or in my bag, and then gather the necessary supplies. My entire left side is limp, and I can’t hear anything, so doing anything that requires precision will be difficult without my dominant hand. Maleki has the fire strike we use for campfires, and even if I had both of my hands, I was never good at starting a fire the old way. We kept my bag light, so I didn’t have any food either, not that there was much left after the mountain range. We should’ve cut some off the Aeternae; we could have eaten for a year alone on that. There was no way to tug it around since I took up all our extra carry weight.

I stood shakily, struggling to find my balance. We didn’t get much time on the beach on the other side, and that one was filled more with slippery rock than soft pearlescent sand. The land inward was a dense forest like a wall of trees and brush whose roots curved above the sand as if rejecting its touch. We were surrounded by the woods at home, and we had seen the forests near Quavoris, but this was different. The thick mass of grass and trees merged to prevent anything from being seen inside. I wielded a disc in case I needed to collect anything of interest. I would need to eat sooner or later, so maybe I can forage the treelined or see if something washes up ashore. Walking around, I collected some driftwood, dry grass, sticks, a few shells that interested me, and some flowers that grew along ruby-like vines that curled around the trunk of a tree. The vines were thorny and stone-like, and when cut at, they shifted, recovering from the assault. It’s almost like the vines were alive. Well, all plants are alive to some extent; they aren’t animals, but they are living. These just feel more alive than any other flora I have seen before. Moving past the tree line will be difficult when Maleki finds me. We will need to find the trial area to leave, but I don’t see that being easy. In the meantime, I can study this area and gather materials for the remaining journey.

High tide arrived with the visibility of all four moons. The lapsing waves took more and more beachfront with every sweep of the sand, and I found myself moving my things farther and farther back. I studied the flower; it looked appealing, but so did anything right now. There was no fire to warm up any food, nor did I possess any food either, so I was contemplating eating the flower. Just a tiny sliver to see if it was not poisonous, and if I didn’t immediately start convulsing, it probably contained some nutrients. The winds on the beach were calmer as the sun disappeared over the ridge of mountains. Night’s shadow had begun to swallow the island, much like the waves did the sand, though their retreat was much swifter.

With the winds and rising waves, I retreated to the tree line, hopeful a torch would pierce through the vale of darkness, where Maleki and Nomen would discover me. I had already gathered the necessary wood for a campfire so that it could be swiftly lit upon their arrival. In fact, I had already arranged the wood logs in a circular pattern, with starter sticks and grass in the middle. If I sleep through the night, maybe they will find me! I laid my head down underneath the bare roots of the trees, and then something caught my eye. Several lights clung to the sides of the tree as if they were hovering. No, that’s not correct — they were hanging. I leaped up and got to my tippy toes, stretching to inspect the lights and their source. Without enough light, it was difficult to tell, but once I got a better view of a lower hanging light, it appeared that the flower’s petals were peeled back to reveal a pear-like shape that was a little smaller than my fist. My first jump failed since there wasn’t much to launch me off the ground, but I was able to step on a low branch and reach my hand above to the fruit-like object. The vine hissed at me, recoiling from the retrieval of the fruit, but the luminescent fruit did not resist, nor did its light dim. Bringing it down to my root-covered crevice, I pecked at the fruit with my disc to see if anything would pop out or rather climb out of the thing.

I had to be sure it was a fruit in the first place. So, with a cut of the object, a sliced-out section fell onto my grass plate. It had light field veins that spread like roots to the center. A stone-like pit was in the middle, but the flesh cut easily like a peach. The meat of the fruit was maroon with an outer lime-colored skin. Without hesitation and with much hunger, I bit into the soft flesh. There was a slight bitterness. Perhaps I had grabbed it too hastily and got a ripe one. However, the aftertaste was sweet and somewhat warm. Every ten minutes, I ate another until I was full. They seemed to grow sweeter with each new one and satiated some of my growing thirst. This wasn’t a perfect system because, eventually, I would need other foods, but sooner than that, I would need actual water. Without a fire, I cannot boil anything, but that won’t be a problem for too long.

I rubbed my temples as I awoke. Eleven scratches appeared in front of me with a round drawing of a circle that indicated the sun. Today was the eleventh day without seeing Maleki, or Nomen, or anyone, or anything.

Had I eaten recently? Water sat in a few shells before me, which I quickly gulped down. I was sitting underneath roots that had collected enough dirt and leaves to form a den that looked out onto the sea. That water wasn’t salty, so it must be rainwater. Had it rained? It must have been while I slept. These coastal storms are supposedly violent, though, so wouldn’t I have awoken? Maleki says I’m a heavy sleeper, so that’s probably why I missed it.

Maleki...it’s been too long. He should have found me by now. Something’s wrong. I left my den with my pack and disc, which was difficult to operate due to the right side of my body being the only operable area. The wind that carried over from the sea hit my shoulders, but I couldn’t hear it. I let out a sound, but I couldn’t hear that either. That’s odd. The cycle rarely ever gave me alternated limbs. It was usually an all-or-nothing. I left my campsite, passing the wooden totem I had made and the empty campfire the sea had torn apart. Walking the beach, I found no footprints; the waves disposed of those quickly. Maleki was out here somewhere, and if he wasn’t coming to find me, he was probably hurt and needed my help. The mountain stood above me as I walked the beach line, and I couldn’t help but think about everything we had gone through just to get this far. How much further would we need to go to get this damned garden.

In the distance, I saw an object that stood out from the white sand slopes. The heat from the sun that glared at the sand masked the object, but from here, it almost looked like a person. Was that Maleki? I limped faster with a hurried pace. Finally, I found him. My feet were blistered, and the rough, heated sand burnt at my feet, but I pushed through the pain to get to my brother. As I got closer, my pace slowed, and my heart fought with my wind to ascertain what I was seeing. Laying before me, staked through the sand, was a wooden totem much like the one I had laid out at my campsite. Had Maleki also laid out a totem before he set out to find me? Inspecting further, I found four letters etched messily into the wood that collectively spelled “Miko.” No, that doesn’t make sense. Why would he put my name? Had I gone in a circle? No, this was a different beach with no den. What the hell is going on? I looked to the mountain and then to the trees to get some semblance of understanding of what was happening to me. The tree line was tall, but something rose out above it. Dark gray billows of smoke climbed into the sky well above the line of trees, but their source was far into the distance within the trees. I felt in my pocket where my compass still sat and functionally operated. The direction of the smoke was Southwest. With compass in hand, I walked the beach until the smokestack was a straight line in front of me and now directly south.

The trees were a tangled mess with no straight paths to follow. If there wasn’t a branch that forced you to duck, then there was one that required a step; sometimes, both were necessary, like an elaborate game of dance. Any normal person could sluggishly move past these brush and branches without much injury, but an ordinary person possessed full function of their limbs, and I did not. The only equalizer was the sharp-bladed disc I had. The metal was bluish-white and reflective at the outside edge, while the interior was dull, allowing me to grip it if needed. Each branch that was cut would fall to the ground, but in its place rose a new wooden spike that grew slightly every few seconds. The healing process was slow enough that I could cut through and move on, but as I looked behind me to where I had entered, the thickness of the forest endured. The area was familiar, and I could see the places that I had cut, but new limbs had already formed and taken over the place of the previous one. Hopefully, I wouldn’t be turning back anytime soon because I would need to put in the same amount of work to get in just to get back out.

That billow of smoke disappeared into the tall trees above me. Tall branches that were dense with even smaller ones all held a thousand tiny leaves and blocked everything but just enough light to move around. There was no way of telling if I was moving in the right direction, and I couldn’t hear anything, even if I got close enough. Thankfully, my compass stayed true in this mass of dirt, wood, and grass, so I didn’t need to worry about tracking the smoke any further. Moving through these trees reminded me of the trips Maleki and I made through the forest by our home. If we weren’t exploring them, we traveled through them to the home of the old healer. Unlike these woods, those trees grew apart from each other; the ground around them protected the dirt- growing grass due to the fallen piney bits that fell from the bushy tops. As forests go, that one was perfect, but this place was like a cruel opposite that infatuated endless growth, so much so that you cannot tell where one tree begins and the other ends.

Trees often challenged each other, slowly and bitterly. We do not hear those battles, but they can be seen over the course of many years. One tree grows taller and shades the other, preventing it from getting necessary sunlight, or it hoards water from the other with thicker roots and more mature stems. A battle of resources, not unlike the stories our father would tell of prior wars and disputes. Was this green jungle the product of a removal of that selfish nature that embeds all things? We protect ourselves or our interests, but is that immoral? When a sapling withers because it was never fed in the shadows of a much taller, already-grown tree, is that wrong? People tend to have an innate nature to protect the defenseless, but plants do not share that same concept. To prevent crowding and fighting, the adult trees force out any others that might grow near. As I cut through these branches that sweep across me and cut against my skin, I envy a well-groomed forest that is balanced by selfish ideals. Maybe it is different for humans and trees; their limbs grow forever unless they are not struck by lightning, broken by fierce winds, or infected by parasitic plants. However, people do not grow forever, and we often live shorter lives than trees do. Comparing the two might be unfair, yet we are unlike insects, and their structure of society and roles can draw many similarities. Stonecutter ants and Jellybees all follow a strict system of power that they follow right out of their eggs and until their death. We aren’t engrained with purpose like the insects; we can only mimic to eventual failure.

My nose picked up a smell after two days of slicing and stepping; the circular metal device in my pocket aligned with the direction of the scent. Excitedly, I whipped my arm with fervor in a cross-like motion to clear a path. As I broke through the wall of branches, an opening with a stream of water appeared. Had I been able to hear, tracking the stream would have been easier. I had to crouch to get down to the stream, but my arm was tired from the constant swinging motion, so I settled at the tiny bar of stone. The smell was stronger, and I sniffed it out to my right, further up the stream. As I headed upstream, I cupped the water into my hands as it flowed and took several long slurps of the sweet water. There was moisture that built up on the trees, but it was difficult to drink. Several crossed sticks and burnt-up logs stood close by the stream that had been used for a fire in the last day or two. I poked at the ash with my disc to see if any embers still breathed, but all that remained was gray ash. The light was fading, and I hadn’t slept in fifty hours, so I decided to use the previous owner’s den as my own. Nothing here identified my brother as its habitant, but this was the closest I had come to seeing another, so I had to hope it was him. Nomen had never mentioned any others that stayed after the trials, but was it possible to live out here? He had told us that this place stole energy passively, so living out here would be too hard. That’s probably why the kingdoms never tried to inhabit these places. Mountain living was tricky as it is, but if your energy was sapped away too, that would make you too susceptible to sickness and make already hard living too challenging to continue. I let those thoughts fade with my sleep and tucked myself onto the cold stone with only what was left of my blanket covering me. Another campfire lay out before me but provided no warmth or light. A cruel sight…

When I woke, my forearms were under my chest, and my forehead pressed against the not-flat stone. I squeezed the fingers in both hands and stretched my left leg, extending it as far as possible to allow my body to wake up. My fingers rubbed at my eyes and fell towards my chin. Wait, I was moving all my fingers and a leg, I thought with widened eyes. This is new. I’m getting better! It was just my hand that moved on my left arm, but this was progress. As I sat up, the arm limped behind my shoulder with no control, but the fingers moved at my command. The bustling of the stream next to me filled my ears, and the leaves hummed against the wind; I could hear again as well.

Now that the sun was up, I had two options: follow the stream or see if there was a new cloud of smoke to follow. I decided to do the latter since it would be the more fruitful method, but if there was nothing to see, I could just follow the stream and hope that’s what Maleki was doing. My hand gripped a branch, and then I climbed up the tangled branches that formed a durable but swiveled form of a ladder. Branches and twigs swept across my face and smacked the outside of my arms, opening them up with minor scrapes as I pushed higher and higher. This tree was taller than others around it, but I needed to get up a little higher to see any smoke. Although the web of limbs and vines made climbing easier, they still required some skill to balance with as I got higher into the tree where the thinnest limbs were. Using my newly gained hand, I placed my left arm up higher by grabbing it with the right and allowed my fingers to clutch onto a branch above me. After that, I positioned my right hand and stepped onto the last branch I deemed safe to bear my weight. My heart scrambled as my mind thought about falling, but I threw away those thoughts with a deep breath. My head swiveled around on a ninety-degree angle, and then I spotted dark gray clouds that crept up above the tree line. Several hours of walking would get me there, but I would miss him if he had already started walking. From here, it looks like I can travel up the stream to get to that new campfire, but if I want to catch up to him, I will have to try and move during the night.

It took me five hours to get to the campsite. He seemed to be stopping at night, which meant I could catch up to him if I kept pushing through this dense forest in the dark. Who am I kidding? I can’t even keep up with him while at full speed during the day because of this stupid limp. He was injured from the mountain and tired from swimming, so maybe he had slowed down. Ugh, I must really be stupid if I think anything could slow my brother down. I can’t let the night slow me right now; that’s the only thing I have against him. While he rests, I’ll advance in the darkness. I had prodded around at his last campsite, but there were still no embers to make a torch with. If I can get there sooner this time, before he or the droplets put out the fire, I’ll have an easier time moving around.

That was a fool’s desire. I reached Maleki’s campsite two hours after sunrise and decided to take a break. My face, arms, and legs were cut in a hundred different places, with bruises on my forearms and thighs. Cool stream water brushed against my face, wiping away the dirt and skin-layer blood. The feeling woke me up, but it stung everywhere, all at once. On Maleki’s campfire sat the charred bones of some kind of small animal. He had eaten. I plucked away at the luminescent fruits during the night, but that was no meal. He had actually eaten. Picking away at the remnants, I searched for any crumb or piece of flesh that might have been missed, but he was diligent in his hunger. My belly demanded food, real food, but I had none to provide. There were no berries or nuts that grew in my path. Without sustenance, my body pleaded for sleep, but that could not be granted. If I rested now for, but even a moment, I would be losing valuable time that could be used to catch up. Damn it all. Rest tomorrow, Miko — just one more day and night of travel. With a pant in my chest, I rose to my feet and continued on the trek.

There were no fish in these streams; it was too small to house anything big enough to eat anyway, so I wet my feet stomping through on occasion when the branches were too thick to cut with a single strike. Upon further inspection, My body needed energy, or my pace would slow. I had not considered it before, but I was desperate, so I started searching the bank and stream for any creatures that might lurk near the water. There were no tiny crabs or frogs, but there were some shells that stuck firmly to the rock like they were a part of it. As I pulled, the creature within tightened its grip on the stone. Using my disc, I pried the edge of the shell up and then between the shelled creature and the chalky white rock. Inspecting the creature, it appeared to be like a snail but more akin to a mollusk, which didn’t settle my apprehension about eating the thing. A sound rumbled in my belly, and I pulled all my thoughts away and used my teeth to pull out the cold flesh within. Disgusting! I’ll have to eat several more to make it worth it, though...Night fell again, and I felt better after eating something other than these luminescent mango limes. I’d like to say I had eaten worse, but they did do the trick as far as hunger goes. Their individual value was not very high, but there was enough of them to satisfy the bottom levels of my appetite.

If my basic math was correct, I should get to Maleki’s campsite an hour or so after he had already left. I felt more invigorated than I had before, so it’s possible that I can speed up my process of movement during the night. Cutting away and stepping tired me, but I let my mind wander as the muscle memory took over. I thought about our parents and the day they left. Those thoughts were usually pushed away since I had little want to bring them back, but this time, I had invited them instead. A memory of Maleki and I against a wooden fence took over. We were peering over it and at our parents, who were arguing about the contents of a letter. “This is the second one you have received and my first.” Our mother said with her auburn hair streaked with dark brown at the roots. She continued in a disheartened tone, “We cannot evade them forever. If we don’t answer, they will come here — if we don’t respond or show, there will be consequences.”

My father retorted with a prideful attitude, “Consequences be damned. I’ll not return, and neither will you.” His eyes met hers in anger. Even in that memory, I had tried to forget, but those eyes blacker than the night pierced through to me. Maleki often had to explain his stories of our parents, how they were, and what they looked like, but I didn’t have to try to remember those eyes of our father. Even when he wasn’t angry, those ever-dark eyes of his seemed to display the emotion in his voice instead.

Mother glanced at him without fear of his words. “You’ll risk this? If they find ou-”

“Do not speak to me like I am unaware, woman. Let them come. I can buy us time.” He stood off the bale of hay, index finger pointing like a sword at her throat.

She brought him into her bosom, disarming his anger for a moment and speaking softer to help guide her point, “You can, yes — for a time. They will be more insistent on the next occasion, and if you fight back too strongly, that invites more attention here.” They were two storms, and though our mother had eased his spirit this time, there were too many times she hadn’t. Each of their storms was violent and quick to rise, but she had grown better at preventing his.

Father sighed, slumping back onto the box of hay and resting his forehead against her belly and hands at her waist, “Resina, please…They need us here. I’m not a great man, but I am learning to be. They make me better.”

“I know, but they will be safer here, happier without-“Several tears broke through her calm demeanor. “Please, my love. Your parents will care for them better than we can; they already provide much.”

My father’s lanky figure burrowed further as he tried to hide his emotions, dropping his head into his palms. “What if we took them with us?”

“You’d separate them? They spend every waking hour together. We could each take one, but taking both is too risky.” Maleki and I locked eyes in worry and confusion but clung back to the conversation, hoping they would be dissuaded.

“It is too early to leave them. I had wished to give them a better life than I had. A fool I was, but more than that, a failure even with my time with them.” His grief peaked, and tears of his own wet our mother’s dress. They embraced each other until their emotions subsided. “One more week, Resina. Please. On your second letter, we shall venture.”

His timing was correct. Maleki and I rumored between each other for a week about what their conversation meant for them and us. We didn’t ask, and our parents didn’t tell; they simply enjoyed the week with us like it was a vacation. That was the happiest week we had ever had with them, but on the fourteenth sun, they broke the news directly to us. They decided to do it separately, Mother told me, and Father told Maleki. She had always treated me like a baby, even calling me so, since she was unwilling to relinquish the idea of me growing up. We had talked for a while, but little details of why they were leaving were shared with us. Instead, they tasked us with assisting our grandparents in their stead. When we finished talking, I overheard Father’s conversation with Maleki. He had charged my older brother with being strong for me as if he had already given up on me getting better. Our father had placed his own burdens on a child of only nine years, diving Maleki and further. Anger swelled in me, so I swiped away the memories with a hard cut at a thicker branch. Three more cuts performed in a motion like the letter X opened up the creek in front of me. Thirty feet ahead, with his back turned towards me, stood a figure with clothes torn and held together by loose sections. Two scratches were etched into their back and were visible through the cuts in the shirt. Finally, I had found him.